


Of Vampire Movies and Watered Down Coke

by ang_the_adverse



Category: Being Human
Genre: M/M, cinema, new moon, vampire movies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-22
Updated: 2009-12-22
Packaged: 2017-10-05 00:40:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/35846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ang_the_adverse/pseuds/ang_the_adverse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>George, Mitchell and Annie go to see a movie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Vampire Movies and Watered Down Coke

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Macadamanaity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Macadamanaity/gifts).



> Slight spoilers for the early scenes of New Moon.  
> (Also: to the requester, "not especially romantic or suicidally depressing" eliminates the only things I seem to be able to write in this fandom, which leads to my apologies that this is not as good as it could be.)  
> Also, due to this request, this story is pre-slash/friendship. (Only, more pre-slash than friendship.)

Annie, apparently, didn’t have to show her ticket to the cinema employee, although whether that was anything to do with her being a ghost, or simply the teenager’s lack of caring was up for debate.

Annie turned just as they were entering Screen 8 to “go to the ladies.”

When it looked like George was going to protest, Mitchell stepped on his toe, _hard_, and George decided maybe it might not have been the best idea.

Annie handed over her popcorn, something which had caused more pain in George’s toe, and stepped into the next door along.

George looked after her for a moment, before Mitchell made a motion with his head and George opened the door for him. (He was carrying the extra popcorn and had his arms full.)

When she arrived a minute later – an advert for orange Wednesdays playing across the screen – Mitchell and George had left a seat between them for her.

She pushed George over, insisting that if someone couldn’t see her they’d not understand why two people who were obviously together – well, _out_ together – and, by that, she meant friends, out like an outing – would leave a seat between them.

She busied herself with chewing the straw in her watered-down-for-extra-profit Coke into the shape she liked.

George was sitting between Annie and Mitchell, and as such was the only one to feel Mitchell tense when the advert came on, the words juddering stylistically across the screen:

/_IMAGINE A WORLD _/ _WHERE ALMOST EVERYONE IS A VAMPIRE_/

They were interspersed with a violent looking image of one vampire biting another.

This wasn’t a big thing, vampire movies came out all the time, they were about to watch one now, Mitchell laughed at them, but this must have hit a little too close to home.

An “orderly” (this is the only way George could describe it) voice asked, “_Do you like being a vampire, son?_”

The boy replied that he was “_never very good at being human_,” and George thought that that was not precisely the point.

/_NO-ONE GROWS OLD_/

The orderly voice spoke again, “_immortality is the miracle, and we are blessed_,” and there was a view of the vampire who spoke, looking smart, official, trustworthy.

This strange view of vampires hit closer to home, George’s inner Literary Criticist told him, because vampires were, at this moment in the advert, neither villains nor sex objects. They were a society, like Herrick wanted.

/_AND THE REMAINING HUMANS ARE HUNTED_/

Flashing images of surgical theatres with blood being taken from bodies appeared and disappeared.

/_AND FARMED FOR BLOOD/_

And rooms full of hanging bodies, unconscious, hooked up to machines. So, that made the vampires villains, but it didn’t seem to George to be any better, because they weren’t animals. They were still vampires.

George dragged his eyes away from the humans, for a second thinking them useless and idiots, then that they were unblameable, then told himself that they were simply characters in a movie he hadn’t even seen.

Mitchell was tense. It was hard to see (not only because the lights had been lowered) because in a cinema chair it’s hard to make your body language say anything but relaxed. But Mitchell managed, his upper body pushing back into the chair, one leg up and tense, resting on the chair in front, the other foot tapping relentlessly.

George nudged his shoulder against Mitchell’s, pulling him out of the trance he seemed to be in, eyes glued to the screen, so that he looked questioningly at George.

“You allright?”

Which was a stupid thing to say, when it was clear that Mitchell _wasn’t_, but there was nothing else that wouldn’t sound idiotic or too private to say in the cinema with Annie just there next to him and strangers still wandering up the aisles.

A voice scraped over their heads, “_what happens when there isn’t a single. Drop. Left?”_

Mitchell blinked again, “yeah . . . yeah.” And there was a half smile and Mitchell nudged George’s shoulder back and turned back to the screen.

“_We’re talking about the extinction of the human race. If a substitute is not found, this will happen to all of us.” _What looked like a flying Gollum from Lord of the Rings jumped across the screen.

Mitchell was shocked into surprised laughter and George joined in in relief.

And the laughter continued, not because of anything particularly funny, but because first they caught each other’s eye and laughed, then noticed Annie staring over incredulously and laughed at that, and when she finally gave in, and giggled at something she didn't get but found her friends laughing infections, they only laughed harder.

And by the time they’d recovered they were watching an advert for _Did You Hear About The Morgans?_ and the vampire movie was just about forgotten.

And finally the opening sequence of _New Moon_ started playing across the screen, and the traditional mocking of vampire movies was afoot, starting off with the complaint that no child should be that rude to someone holding a present, and then that no friends should be that rude concerning their friend’s “significant other,” even if they hated them.

“Do you think that’s a little too close to be getting in a car park? A high school car park?” Murmured George as Kirsten Stewart breathed in an “aroused” way, lips pressed into Robert Pattison’s.

“No way, you’re just being over sensitive -” replied Annie.

“Over_ly_,” muttered George.

“-it’s fine, right Mitchell?”

Mitchell leant over George to grin at Annie, “I still get offended by certain lengths of skirt, I might not be the best one to ask.”

George grinned back and Mitchell removed himself from George’s immediate presence.

Onscreen, Edward was telling Bella, “_You give me everything just by breathing,” _to which Bella responded with a gasp louder than the rest.

George leant over and whispered, warm into Mitchell’s ear, “That one was a _big_ gift.”

Mitchell turned so they were almost nose to nose, “breathe for me George,” he faux begged.

George laughed and blew out in a silent whistle, the air between them becoming heated and slightly damp with water vapour.

George waited for Mitchell to reply, but after a moment the silence was filled with Annie’s quiet cry of, “Oh, look, Jasper isn’t wearing his constipated face anymore!” and he laughed, turning to face her.

Mitchell was frozen for a second, before leaning back into his chair and taking a sip of watery Coke, ready to watch half Bella’s class unbelievablly sob over an ancient copy of Romeo and Juliet, and Edward angst about his inability to commit suicide, should he ever want to.

**Author's Note:**

> The "Daybreakers"(vampire movie) trailer can be found here: http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi4040294937/  
> "New Moon" can be found in cinemas.  
> Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet" can be found in too many formats to list.
> 
> (None of the above, or Being Human, belong to me in any legal/commercial way.)


End file.
